The Cockeyed Cowboys of Calico County

Dan Blocker stars!

A heartwarming, hilarious Western! When the town’s only blacksmith, Charlie Bicker’s mail-order bride from Boston is a no-show, he threatens to move back east. So friends and customers take matters of the heart into their own hands—finding him a substitute wife!

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The Cockeyed Cowboys of Calico County

Bonanza fans! Dan Blocker stars along with, Nanette Fabray, Jack Elam, Mickey Rooney and Wally Cox in this heartwarming, hilarious Western!

The small town of Calico has a problem. Their only blacksmith, the burly, but kind and slightly naïve Charlie Bicker, is thinking of moving back east. His decision has nothing to do with the rigors of frontier life, or his labor-intensive work at the anvil, or the closeness of rough small-town living in the Old West. It has everything to do with—love!

The softie that he is, Charlie wants a wife and family, a whole passel of kids and grandkids, but there aren’t any eligible young women in the middle of nowhere. So he puts together all the money he’s saved in the past year, and sends for a mail-order bride from Boston, but on the day of her scheduled arrival, his intended is a no-show. Heartbroken, humiliated and defeated, Charlie begins to make plans to go back home. The townsfolk are in a panic. Not only do they care for Charlie and want to see him happy, but they also need a blacksmith, so they come up with a Plan B: they will find Charlie a substitute wife!

Charlie lives on the straight and narrow, and he’s never been in the town’s saloon. His buddies in town know that, so they approach the new dance hall girl, Sadie, to pose as the bride he ordered, claiming to have arrived late to town. The plan is after a few days, Sadie will decide she doesn’t really want to get married and she’ll leave with enough money from the townsmen to relocate. Sadie has never met, nor seen Charlie, either, so what can go wrong? All she has to do is reject the same kind of pushy, drunken guy whose advances she rebuffs every day.

Unaware of her profession, Charlie meets Sadie and is smitten. He courts her as the sweet, vulnerable and romantic guy he is. Sadie, unused to being treated with such respect and genuine tenderness, begins to fall in love with Charlie.

Could this be a huge win-win for the town of Calico? Could it be the perfect ending to a perfect love story? Not so fast! There’s a new arrival in town. Roger Hand, Sadie’s old flame, is bent on reuniting with his lost love. Now, in a hilarious series of events, the townspeople must do everything they can to keep Roger away from the love birds!